Securities Exchange Act of 1934, english assignment help

I have my draft paper with my teacher comments and I need some one to correct the paper.

This paper worth 30% of my grade and I need some one sure can do it correctly.

You can see the full comment in the will attached.

and below is the general comments:

This essay needs a lot of revising in order for it to be a working essay that fits the needs of the assignment. Right now, there is way too much informative pieces rather than analysis information. I need to see your analysis throughout and how these sources you have chosen impact your overall thesis. Nevertheless, the following are the three items that need the most work:

1. You need to have a clear, argumentative thesis. This thesis needs to state an overall opinion you were able to come to based on the study of these three sources. Right now, there is just information and no analysis of the information for how it fits into an argument. Essentially, this is an informative essay in its current state, which is not what the assignment calls. Therefore, you need to rework the entire flow of the paper into an argumentative form.

2. You need to introduce your sources and how they fit into the overall scheme of the thesis. You use these sources, which is good; however, you need to introduce the authors and analyze them for their credibility in the initial stages. After describing the credibility, you will then discuss these sources and what they have to say about your topic. This section will be made easier once you have an argument to make.

3. The organization needs to be reworked once a clear thesis/argument is developed. Right now, it appears to be just information paragraph after information paragraph. Therefore, rework this so that you describe each source separately and how each source impacts the overall thesis.